What About The Groom?

A few weeks ago The Litchfield County Times received the book “How I Planned Your Wedding: The All True Story of a Mother and Daughter Surviving the Happiest Day of Their Lives” (Harlequin, $21.95) by New York Times best-selling author Susan Wiggs and her daughter, Elizabeth Wiggs Maas. My first thought was, “What about the groom? Isn’t it also the groom’s day?”

I didn’t take this book too seriously until last weekend when I saw it on tables at both Borders [See story on the closing of Borders in last  week’s Litchfield County Times] and Barnes and Noble. I thought I might give it a second chance.

The mother-daughter bond is tested more than once as the two collaborate to plan life’s ultimate celebration–a dream wedding. Often poignant, sometimes irreverent and always hilarious, the book is packed with useful advice from both ends of the cupcake tasting table, according to the description on the book jacket. 

I admit I have a low threshold for books with no substance and this book is definitely one of them. I found the daughter to be a spoiled brat and much of the bond between mother and daughter seemed forced. But what bothered me most is that the groom is invisible and it is a typical “chick-lit” book. 

With wedding season in full bloom, this is the perfect book for bridezillas and mothers who believe the “hoopla” is more important than the actual marriage. The question in my mind is, what about the “ever after,” after the rice is thrown and the wedding dress is hung in the closet?

“I was born to be a bride. There are family photographs of me in a bridal gown dating all the way back to age two,” says Elizabeth. The book takes readers from the engagement to the beginning of the couple’s lives. (Oh, by the way, the groom’s name is Dave, but this book is clearly not about him. It’s about the mother and the bride—it’s their day after all.) 

Ms. Wiggs and her daughter tell their intertwined tales from the bridal trenches, sharing lessons gleaned during the sometimes contentious, yet more often magical process of orchestrating life’s ultimate celebration. Readers accompany Elizabeth through the process of planning her day, from choosing and dressing the attendants, working with a wedding planner, deciding on the right approach for various details and much more.

Susan shares her own perspective with other mothers of the bride, suggesting they try to provide a sea of calm and maintain the voice of reason, according to a release.

For those getting married this spring, this may be the perfect light-hearted book needed to get through this often tense time of planning.

Happy Valentine's Day!

This year I am making a conscious effort to view Valentine’s Day as a day to celebrate with everyone I love and not to look at it as a day just for couples. While I have never been a particular fan of the holiday, it is a day to recognize those we love in our lives and to show our appreciation for them.

Valentine’s Day is Monday, but what do many of us actually know about its origins and the true meaning of Valentine’s Day?  The Morris Congregational Church United Church of Christ in Morris, recently sent The Litchfield County Times its newsletter, The Lamplighter,  for February. 

The first two pages are dedicated to fully understanding the meaning of Valentine’s Day and its origins. Pastor Kimberly Wadhams began by talking about who St. Valentine actually is. 

Ms. Wadhams said that if the scarcity of information about St. Valentine isn’t enough, consider that there are two Valentines associated with the third-century Christian Church, both martyred for their faith.

“There was Valentine of Rome, who was executed by order of the Roman Emperor Claudius II in A.D. 269,” said Ms. Wadhams. “His relics are at are at the Church of Saint Praxed in Rome and at Whitefriar Street Carmelite Church in Dublin, Ireland.” 

Ms. Wadhams continues in saying that there are some records of Valentine of Terni, who became a bishop in A.D.  196 and who is said to have been martyred by order of Emperor Aurelian, who, interestingly,  didn’t come to power until A.D.  270.

“Perhaps there was yet another Valentine, whose relics are at the Basilica of Saint Valentine in Terni,” said Ms. Wadhams.

Ms. Wadhams also said she found under the Feb. 14 date a record of a St. Valentine who was martyred in Africa.  There is just that one reference, but no more.

Moving on, Ms. Wadhams said, “Some of our earliest recorded histories show us that human beings existed within the whirlpools and eddies of romance from the beginning of our time. Through the ages as well as today, romance has been a thing of delightful mystery right along with the obscurity of the recorded history of St. Valentine’s Day.”

Referencing Pastor Billy Blackmon from Illinois, Ms. Wadhams spoke about “Valentine Dreams,” Hhow can people make their Valentines Dreams Come True on Feb. 14. 

How can couples rekindle the flame in their marriage, or experience the feelings of love?  Ms. Wadhams later offered her recipe toward realizing dreams.

She began by saying we must encourage one another, and ask ourselves when was the last time we praised those that are important to us in our lives with words of encouragement. 

She continued with the advice to comfort one another. “Valentine dreams do come true, when we learn to share the priceless gift of comforting one another,” said Ms. Wadhams.

Spending  time with one another, Ms. Wadhams said, is vitally important for any relationship, if it is go grow.

“Whether for those who are married, considering marriage, or just wanting to be friends there is no substitute for the love which grows out of knowing and enjoying each other’s company,” said Ms. Wadhams.

She concludes the newsletter with two last recommendations: be tender and compassionate to one another and have a good attitude.

A Chocolate Carnival

Last weekend I was in New York City and was passing the store window of the popular Godiva chocolatier. As I walked past the window, I saw people shooting photographs of something and my first thought was, “What is there to photograph? It’s only chocolate.” But then, as I got closer, I realized they were shooting photos of a desk and chair entirely made of chocolate, decorated just in time for Valentine’s Day.

We all know that February is the perfect time to indulge in chocolate, whether it’s only staring at it through a glass window, salivating at the sight of a chocolate desk or chair, or in a more local sense by attending a Chocolate Carnival.

A Chocolate Carnival? Yep, you read correctly. This one will be hosted by New Morning Natural and Organic in Woodbury on Feb. 26 from 6:30 to 10:00 p.m., at the Heritage Hotel in Southbury. It is a dinner extravaganza to chase away the winter blues, according to a release sent by New Morning.

Charles Monagan, editor of Connecticut Magazine, will be the host and music by the rocking Zydecats, wines from three Connecticut vineyards and delectables from two chocolatiers promise for an unforgettable dinner. There will be Creole cuisine with dark chocolate and accents of the Caribbean created by New Morning’s own chef, Carol Byer-Alcorace.

The menu introduces dark organic chocolate in every form imaginable, from Crayfish Étouffée in Phyllo cups to chunky chicken Gumbo and All Fools chocolate cake. 

Those attending this chocolate filled event will have the chance to taste the difference local products make—vegetables from Fort Hill Farm in New Milford, pork from Rowland Farm in Oxford, Soffer Farm eggs from Branford, milk from Arethusa Farm in Litchfield, herbs from Castle Rock in Bethlehem and Wave Hill Bread from Wilton. For the first time ever, new hot, spiced cocoa from Coffee, Tea, Etc in Goshen will be served. 

This sixth annual benefit dinner will benefit the programs at Audubon Center at Bent of the River in Southbury—a 660-acre outdoor sanctuary with 15 miles of walking trails and an environmental education center for all ages. New Morning is encouraging guests to bring a camera and meet birds of prey from the Audubon Center in Sharon.

Another exciting element to this event is that, in the spirit of Mardi Gras, which is also on the horizon, guests who wear a mask could win a prize!

Tickets are $75 a person. Details and ticket sales are available at www.newmorn.com, www.bentoftheriver.audobon.org. Call Jennifer at 203-264-5098 for special diets and table reservations. Order early! This event sells out.

IRS Regulations require all charities to disclose the value of all goods and services conveyed to donors in connection with their gifts.  Audubon Center at Bent of the River estimates the value of the goods and/or services recieved in exchange for this gift to be $15.